This is a narration of conversation between a seeker and Rupert Spira on a youtube video. My notes and my paraphrasing as needed
Seeker: I am into this (mind/enlightening) stuff for last 40 years. I am not awakened yet. Some where here and there - I get glimpse of it - I not asking a grand event but something that I am waiting to happen. Why I am not enlightened yet? It is frustrating - not being awaken. "Ahaa" moment has not happened. Feeling like hitting my head to wall and say "wake up" its sick feeling. I am exhausted, tired, aged. Desire for liberation is important.
Rupert: You are STILL expecting some event to happen. That is problem. You are waiting for a marvelous or less grand event of enlightenment. Its not event. Even the phrase "shift" is an event. Its a concession for inadequacy of the language to call it as a shift.
Let us say you watching TV and in the movie you see a beautiful landscape. you are lost into that. At that time someone enters the room and says to you "Look at the screen". What do you do?
When TV is off - you can see the screen. When you switch on the TV - the screen does not disappear but takes the form of movie that is be shown the screen. But the screen is still there. you get lost in the movie. You forget that you are seeing screen. Your friend draws your attention asks look at the screen.
Think carefully now - were you not looking at the screen all the time (first before as blank screen and then screen showing landscape). At no point of time you stopped looking at the screen. Now tell me - while you are lost in the landscape on TV screen - watching or shifting your focus to the screen - is that a new and marvelous event?
Does screen show off in the movie?
Seeker : No
Rupert: What you are looking for is - an event in the movie (your subjective experience) - called "enlightenment". In this metaphor - it is looking at the screen while your lost in landscape displayed on the screen.
As long as you looking for the screen in the movie its not going to come up.
when you are looking the landscape- what you have to do to see the screen?
Seeker: In metaphorical sense - nothing.
Rupert : In that sense - enlightenment is not new thing to be experienced. Its not something that was lost and needs to be found. Best and closest we could say is "screen was overlooked" as focus was more on the landscape on the screen.
Due to our fascination on drama of movie, the landscape - in other words - our fascination on drama of mind and body - we seem to have lost sense or track of the reality - the screen - the consciousness that takes the shape of movie (or mind body) on the screen.
Then as logical beings - we go in search of this lost thing (the reality)- looking out side. It is like looking for the TV screen in the movie that is displayed on the very thing that you are searching.
Its like character in the movie searching for the screen.
Enlightenment is recognizing that screen is there and at every moment - you also will know that you were indeed looking at the screen ALL time. You never ceased to see the screen. But due to drama of landscape you felt that you missed the screen and you go out side to look for the screen.
You never ceased to be ever present unlimited "awareness"
Seeker: Sometimes this "limited self" melts away and I feel "wow" what a nice feeling. Wow she disappeared
Rupert: Why you want her (limited self - ego) to disappear?
Seeker: Because she is miserable.
Rupert: Ok... coming to metaphor of you screen/movie/landscape. There are several characters. There is one woman in the movie you don't like.
Seeker: yes. I dont want her in the movie.
Rupert: So what you are saying is "until that character is out the movie - I cannot see the screen"
Seeker: Yes. All the investment is on her.
Rupert: Whose problem is She? To the screen is that character a "problem" ? She may be problem to another character. But for the screen - it does not matter.
Awareness does not have problem, does not understand what is problem as it does not resist ANY experience - there has to be "I don't like this". Its like an empty space.
Here - "my horrible separate self needs to be got rid off as I am fed up with her. The "I" that is fed up with her is another form of her self.
In other words separate self is perpetuating itself by trying to rid of itself
See the situation clearly.
YOU CANNOT GET RID OF AN ILLUSION. Try getting rid of a ghost or mirage in desert. or Try to waking up someone who is acting to be sleeping.
What you have to do the get rid of the landscape (illusion of landscape on screen)? Either switch of the TV or just create thought that "its an illusion".
Just see that its an illusion. Don't spend your time trying to GET RID of an illusion. Its waste of time
Awareness does not be enlightened. Its always been the light thru which we know all experiences.
Enlightenment is most FANCY name given to most ordinary, simple and easily attainable experience that is accessible to each one of us.
Because sense of awareness cannot be found by the mind (as mind self emerges out of the awareness) - in most cases it deemed missing. As a result of that "peace and happiness that are inherent characteristics of awareness also seem to be missing. Hence imaginary self goes out in the world searching for missing happiness and peace.
we know that peace and happiness are not "out" in the world but they are part of most common experience of "being aware" It is innermost experience. Its not new experience, it never left you, its not something you go for searching. In our day today experience - closest we could say "its overlooked".
Metaphorically - the screen has been overlooked due to our over bearing fascination with mind/body phenomenon.
All you need to is soften/relax you attention towards objects of experience and slightly turn that into the awareness with which these objects are known. Putting the camera slightly out of focus. Then attention falls back to its source as this empty awareness.
Instead of noticing yourself as cluster of thoughts and feelings - think that you are the one who is aware of that cluster of thoughts. All these thoughts flow by, they change. But me the witness and one who is aware of these is still and ever present.
Look among all experiences ask the question who is ever present in all those experience - stay with that. That is enlightenment.
